A – Adolescents who pretend to not be able to readjust to get my attention. How little did your mother pay you compliments in order for me to be stuck saying “A full stop means you have to pause, say it with a bit more enthusiasm!” Parents please, care for your kids more, I don’t like being the mother you never were.

B –  Bullshit. I’m tired of hearing it. Those who say one thing yet mean another – grow some brain cells before I whack you with the stupid stick. Its not a metaphor. Ill find a stick, and I will whack you with it.

C – Citing. For all the Harvard and Legal referencing I absolutely HAD to use on all assignments this semester and yet did not understand until half way through (and therefore losing marks for poor citing)… crawl up Jan’s (repulsively huge) ass and die.
[Oh, and a side note for my newest member of the family, my mouse "Capsicum" because shes a sneaky fucker]

D – D for DEPLORABLE.  You dumb fuck retards who insist on blaming the entire population of P plate drivers when you people who think its A-Okay to merge without using an indicator, to drive 75 up my ass in a 60 zone or to speed in front of me when I’m half way around a round about… Don’t make me go all kindergarten cop on your ass. GO BACK AND LEARN HOW TO DRIVE.

E – Exams, which no one informed me I didn’t need to pass as long as I have an overall pass mark. I blame you for my subsequent early death from heart disease.

F – Foundations of Policing which made me subject to Jan’s horrific 4 sizes too small shirts, and Tech-mans antics… I don’t hate you (although I probably should for killing my sex drive) I thank you, for the endless Jan and Tech-man jokes at your expense.

G – For Gee Dee. (That is, God Damn) My first effort to Swear Less. If none of you have heard me use it, thats because, I’m failing at this. Ill try harder.

H – the $150 I spent on hair extensions after cutting my hair off the raise money for cancer. A poor effort on my behalf. I shamelessly get bored of things way too easy.

I – IO meaning (taking a stab in the dark) Moderately impaired – Basically the Special Education kid that remembered my name. “Hi Sarah. Its Sarah.” Gee Dee sorry for being so simple, and happy that I was remembered by a kid who sees countless teachers each day and remembered me after seeing me once.

J –  Jesi… because Ive known you since 1993, and absolutely nothing, not even our stubbornness, bluntness or anything else could stop us from calling each other ugly and fat. I sang for you, and I meant it. (Serz.)

K – Katie… ever noticed your name comes after Jesi’s! (H,I,J,K) That’s unbelievably weird. PBC. Your enthusiasm brightens my drab drabbbb days and we totally have the same job now. (Serz.)

L – Liars, Ive been there. Ive done it. Ive lied alot, and I’m tired of it. But I’m mostly tired of the liars around me. I’m trying a new thing where I don’t bitch and moan about people who I call friends, if you read this and think “Errrrr is that a go at me”… No its not (But guilty conscience is a damning thing isnt it.)

M – months, how long its been since I laid back, and actually relaxed, without something like Uni or whatever else on my mind. M also for the Month until I get that.

N – No one knows who this is. But I do. N for the random letter Id put you under, coz I cant put you into words… A few people might take some random stabs at who this could possibly be (but they would be so so wrong.) Thank you. (ps – I could have put you under any letter because you are that fucking random.)

O – O for 0, the number not the letter. That is, the amount of kids I have, so stop asking me if I am 23 with kids.

P - For lack of proper English or punctuation (not to mention Grammar.) Point is I’m rambling, so deal with it. I’ll finish this A-Z tomorrow.